Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Portals and Hermit Crabs

I went to visit the crabby Jedi. First he had me wait in this room with a group of Yoda-sized people and a kid. They were talking about some dude named Napoleon and hermit crabs. I waited for half an eternity before I finally got a receptionist.

Receptionist: Do you have an appointment?

Me: Since when do Jedi have receptionists?

Recptionist: Since they started paying more than minimum wage. Do you have an appointment?

Me: Maybe.

Recptionist: I can schedule one for yesterday.

Me: Can you schedule one for half an eternity ago?

Receptionist: Just a minute.

Then that classical music you hear when you're on hold started playing all around.

Receptionist: I can get you in at one am on Monday or 11 pm on Tuesday.

Me: Okay. What do I need to bring?

Receptionist: Five unmatched socks from beyond the void.

Me: Huh?

Recptionist: And a sack lunch.

Then she handed me this huge stack of papers.

Receptionist: And you need to fill these out.

Me: huh?

Receptionist: that doesn't make you sound any more intelligent.

Me: I can't hear you over the muzak.

I ended up leaving with the stack of papers and directions to the void of lost socks. Muzak and paperwork. It's as if the Sith have taken over my corner of the afterlife.

T 4 1-1 1_ out


Blogger Master Yoda said...


Tag. It you are.

12:02 AM  
Blogger Captain Typho said...

So... even after you're dead you have to fill out forms?

Are you sure you're not in Hell?

1:53 PM  
Blogger flu said...

flippin Jedi bureaucracy...

11:04 AM  
Blogger Leia said...

This reminds me of a dream I once had.

5:58 PM  
Blogger flu said...

I dreampt of something like this reminding me of a dream once or twice... or maybe not

1:53 PM  

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