Final Draught

Emotion, Yet peace
Ignorance, yet knowledge
Passion, yet serenity
Chaos, yet harmony
Death, yet the Force

Now I'm off to the void of Lost Socks. and those are the directions I found in the packet provided as per Section 1.2.315 of the rules for the conduct of something or other. Apparently I'm not allowed to bring any equipment either. Like what? A butterfly net?

Anyway apparently another time portal hit me over the head. But I'm here. Sort of. As the case may be.

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Paperwork

I found this strange "questionnaire" among the paperwork I was given. I'm not too good with this whole base 10 thing but most of the forms seem to be in other bases so I'm ok.

10 years ago I was:
passed on
no more
ceased to be
expired
gone to meet the Force

5 years ago I was:
a stiff
bereft of life
I rested in peace
pushing up the daisies
my metabolic processes were history

1 year ago I was:
off the twig
kicked the bucket
shuffled off my mortal coil
run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile
I was an ex-jedi

Yesterday I was:
Filling out forms
Developing carpal tunnel syndrome
filling the ice bucket
developing frostbite
filling the ice bucket with warm water

5 snacks I enjoy the most:
Mt. Dew
cold brussel sprouts
Mt. Dew
gummy bears
Mt. Dew
oreos
Mt. Dew
pop tarts
did I mention Mt. Dew?

5 songs I know all the words to:
Living Dead Girl
Pinball Wizard
Voodoo
I Will Survive
The Logical Song

5 ideal places to run away to:
Lordaeron
Veronaville
Reach
Arrakis
Kentarres IV

5 items you will never see me wear:
PVC (saw waaaaaaayyyyyyyy too much of that during my days as a groupie)
barbed wire (too scratchy)
restaurant placemats (last time I took a dare... in public)
jewelry (too likely to get caught on... stuff)
shorts

5 biggest joys in my life:
War Craft III
Halo
Sims 2
Warcraft IV
Command and Conquer
and Qui-Gon's on there somewhere

5 favorite toys:
PC
Playstation
X-Box
Gamecube
nintendo
(or does Qui-Gon belong on this list?)

Tagged(don't know anyone with a blog who hasn't been hit):
Clee
Anoon Bondara
Adi Gallia
Luminara Unduli
Ali Alann

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Portals and Hermit Crabs

I went to visit the crabby Jedi. First he had me wait in this room with a group of Yoda-sized people and a kid. They were talking about some dude named Napoleon and hermit crabs. I waited for half an eternity before I finally got a receptionist.

Receptionist: Do you have an appointment?

Me: Since when do Jedi have receptionists?

Recptionist: Since they started paying more than minimum wage. Do you have an appointment?

Me: Maybe.

Recptionist: I can schedule one for yesterday.

Me: Can you schedule one for half an eternity ago?

Receptionist: Just a minute.

Then that classical music you hear when you're on hold started playing all around.

Receptionist: I can get you in at one am on Monday or 11 pm on Tuesday.

Me: Okay. What do I need to bring?

Receptionist: Five unmatched socks from beyond the void.

Me: Huh?

Recptionist: And a sack lunch.

Then she handed me this huge stack of papers.

Receptionist: And you need to fill these out.

Me: huh?

Receptionist: that doesn't make you sound any more intelligent.

Me: I can't hear you over the muzak.

I ended up leaving with the stack of papers and directions to the void of lost socks. Muzak and paperwork. It's as if the Sith have taken over my corner of the afterlife.

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Temporal Distortions

I found a time portal in my closet. Ok so that isn't quite right. I got a time portal [i]dropped[/i] on me while I was in my closet playing Diablo II. More powerful than you can imagine indeed. Turns out one of those strict ancient Jedi ghost instructors didn't like all the time I was spending putting back together my collection of games and equipment. So poof. Here I am nearly two months later and a lot dustier.

I think I will now go seek out this master of portals and beat him u- er give him a piece of my mind or challenge him to a tetris contest.

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Maybe I Was Wrong...

About that whole not needing sleep. I wake up and suddenly I've missed two updates. Wow! It's like hibernation with a caffeine headache.

Anyway my janitor closet is pretty much the way I left it though that space heater might have scorched the floor. Come to think of it why do I have that heater? And so much has happened out there. Can anyone tell me who this Barney Fife person is? I heard about him from a passing conversation between a couple Jedi.

I also found one of those cool history books with the pictures hidden in here. It's all about Nomi Sunrider and the Qel-Droma brothers and Exar Kun and well you get the picture. I would read it but it's a bit too informative for me. And why'd they include all those pictures anyway? Is it supposed to make learning fun or something? Weird.

And before I go; a useful gaming tip I found on the internet. Turn your monitor on. No, seriously it's don't hook up your entire mp3 library to GTA. I heard Pink Floyd and the Halo soundtrack just don't go well with whatever slang it is they speak. Before listening to Skywalker I had no idea anyone spoke that way in real life. I'm still not sure they do.

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Messed up on the nose a bit

This is a picture of me before and after my death. Someday i may scrape together the money for PhotoShop but until that day comes... I think the PhotoStudio and Microsoft Office Picture Manager are strong with me. Or something like that.

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ABC

I've come across an interesting quiz in several and have decided to share my answers.

A- Alien vaccinations: Five types of flu, Talasea skin rash, Garqi cough, and 14 types of fungus
B- Best game: toss up between Halo and Rogue.
C- Current living space: I found this neat janitor's closet and I've been stocking it MT Dew
D- Doorbell ringtone: Addams Family theme
E- Easiest class: CS 121 (Word for Dummies)
F- Favorite soda: Mounatain Dew
G- Games: Tetris
H- Hobby: Lurking
I- Invaluable advice: Mustard is not a substitute for mayonaise.
J- Just a little vinegar goes a very long way
L- Last watched movie: The Matrix
M- Most used piece of equipment: towel
O- Operating System: Windows XP
P- Perfect temperature: 50 degrees fahrenheit
Q- Quote: "All the world is a game and the men and women merely players." Sam Hughes
R- RTM: A last resort.
S- Song you sang last: "Bloody Well Right"
T- Time it takes to eat breakfast: none
U- Unknown fact about me: I played with Barbies as a child. Some say this is where my violent tenndencies began.
V- Victories: Fill-it, Halo, Javanoid, Cubis, Hearts, Spider Solitaire, Commander Keen
W- Where's the Food: Check behind the mops.
X- X: Marks the spot.
Y - Years since you've been breathing?: Something like 20. Not quite sure though.
Z- Zots: Disgusting.

I'm not sure I followed the rules. But it was fun.

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